i don't know it's that saying in between a hard place and a rock but it's just you don't feel

you can do anything so you stay stuck um do you see a point in the future when you will be able

to make changes are you optimistic not really i don't haven't felt optimistic for quite a long

time i just felt like i'm always thinking about what am i actually looking forward to

for me right now i'm just looking forward to going away for a week well you've always been

like that beyond that i don't know a bit of sunshine that will be nice but when you come back

exactly what it's like for me when you go away do you leave work at home or do you do bits of work

on you on your phone or yeah i do bits of work invariably when we go away something

some crisis will crop up

and i'll end up stressed and worried but those things don't seem to

where was that going when i was in london and i was changing to get to stansted airport and one

of our drivers was in a big car a big crash with the van on the motorway right and i i realized

then that i just wasn't panicking anymore about this stuff i just let it wash over me

and enjoyed my trip and my flight

it would have been a big worry before being in the sky and not having a signal

they expect me to sort it out but i don't know what's that you couldn't do anything about it no

no but it used to be like that when the business was going well you still had lots

of problems like that and you'd be like screaming and shouting on the phone and stressing about and

everything around you would be annoying you because only a granddad come on you'll be

screaming and shouting because you haven't got the dongle or something and there's no internet

and like we're walking in the middle of town you're just shouting and to nobody just being

upset trying to get online because there is no internet or whatever and it's things like that

it's just like no I'm not like that anymore that's what I'm saying well you aren't yeah exactly but

you aren't because improve we have 5G everywhere we go and it's fine you don't that's an olden days

problem now no I'm saying I'm not like that anymore I don't get nervous and tense you don't

I know that's the medication maybe it works very nicely you can't go on holiday all the time or go

away all the time um and we are

yeah yeah but even that reset to me it calms me down and makes me okay it's the sun I think just

this one okay so if we okay will you be able to sit down together and make some sort of plan not

set in stone with some sort of plan of you know I don't know what you can both do in the next six

months yeah but this is what I keep saying to you but you you don't quite commit to anything you

don't make work like that like okay for example well to make a plan six months this is what's

gonna happen with TLC if I don't I don't know whether it's your business you're gonna try and

give yourself a timeline to improve things that in the business and if that doesn't work then

make a plan of slowly to try and wind it down and and where else you can try and look for opportunities

yeah like making plans and looking at options and all it's always very like everything is vague

and oh we'll see and whatever like no plan no commitment no nothing for anything let me make

plans together or do you like to keep that sort of stuff separate well I think he likes it we're

always in the parking so I mean if you do have a baby and you've got a new job and a good career

and a good salary then I'm not I'm really don't mind if I'll be at home I'm responsible for

family things more okay now my job is not going to cover our life uh expenses for you know that

not all the time but you know I don't know about a tiny baby either but